the contrived artificial superficiality..fake one...
i realize that indoor macro photography without a ring flash is really not easy. i also realize that i am quite bitter. and very cynical...right now at least...i know it hardly surfaces..because it is hard to deal with..but beneath all the stupid jokes and contrived expressions i am not at ease. i am discontent about the lack of answers i am getting..when left to yourself without the jokes, the discontentment surfaces.but when u ignore it...experience just piles ontop of it daily..the pile then gets higher and higher and u slowly forget it..and then you cant be yourself because being yourself means being discontent and upset. but that means its not fully dealt with. and then you come to the conclusion that the predominant experience in life isnt the moral dilemma of right or wrong, but the experience of ugliness. this is the reality of life as seen and understood.
posted by gneh-snah @ 2:02 AM
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